Comparing Master Chief's Fanny

The Halo Paramount+ series came out to much fanfare. There was even a great face reveal, reminiscent of the 1995 Judge Dredd face reveal (a classic film). But what was completely unexpected (but really appreciated) was a Master Chief butt reveal.

We've had video game kiester reveals before: Commander Shepherd, Geralt of Rivia, Chaos Witch Quelaag. But this a gaming history first, a character's bum on the small screen. However, to judge the Chief's rump is to judge Pablo Schreiber's rump, as he is the one portraying the iconic character.

So the question really is "How well does Schreiber portray the iconic hiney?" to do this I had to venture into the series and take a good look at the evolution of Chief cheeks, and boy does the Chief's hams go through an evolution. So the question now becomes "Which rear end do we compare it to?"

The Chief's haunches actually become wider of the course of the games, I guess tea-bagging his enemies did wonders for his derriere. In Halo Infinite he even seems to add a bit of of girth to his mid section, a sign of old age. However, in the Master chief slims down a little for the Anniversary version of Halo 2. Now accounting for the shape of the armor, I've determined that Schreiber was going for the Halo 3 Master Chief caboose, decisively the best glutes of the entire series.

Good on Schreiber for attempting and succeeding at portraying the best buns of the whole series. What we can say for certain, is that no matter which version of Halo we play, and now watch, Master Chief has one nice ass.

#ass #cutebutt #yumm